Hey Nerds, I Hate H.P. Lovecraft

You heard me right: I hate H.P. Lovecraft. His writing is terrible, which is perhaps why he wasn't appreciated during his lifetime. It's as if Nathaniel Hawthorne rewrote the Greek classics. The stories are so drawn out and tedious. He pays minute attention to details like architecture, culture, and language while at the same time ignoring plot pacing and development. The man uses the "deus ex" construct like it's going out of style! Oh, and don't get me started on his vocabulary. Here's a handful of his over- and mis-used words:

1. Terrible
2. Horrible
3. Blasphemous
4. Unspeakable
5. Cyclopean
6. Infernal
7. Foul
8. Basalt

And don't try to justify his bad writing by saying, "Oh, but look at all the great writers he influence." So? That's doesn't somehow make his stuff lovable. Just because Quentin Tarrentino was influenced by all kinds of schlock material that doesn't make those movies any better. There. I've had my say.

And Ye Shall Know Him by His Power Tie

Can't decide who to vote for yet in the American presidential election? I can! But for those of you less-able proles I'll provide you with a short list from which you can pick. Make your mark heavy and dark with your extra large crayons!

Lord Voldemort. Keeping it simple. Strong anti-muggle agenda. Doesn't listen to the Death Eater lobby.

Max. Psychotic lagomorph with a hound dog, crime-fighting partner. What's a lagomorph? I don't know either. But you're already on the Internet so why don't you go find out?

Cthulhu. You can't possible be able to pronounce this blasphemous name. But humans were never expect to comprehend the infinite horrors of the Ancients.

Darth Vader. In these uncertain times feel secure in knowing that that isn't a moon. It's a space station.